Jeremy -- same location. Both angled. Too much? Too little? You decide.

One of two pictures I'm posting from our entire Airlie Beach/Whitsundays adventure. Why, you ask? Well, I took a total of about 15 pictures on the whole trip for a number of reasons: laziness being right up there on the list. I think Shehz took up my slack though, and you'll be seeing a bunch of his beauties posted shortly. This, by the way, is Shehz and Row looking over the bay at the Airlie Beach Lagoon. Nice.

mad monday

greetings and salutations!

it has been quite a while since we managed to piece together a few words detailing our most recent adventures. i'm sure most of you care very little about the text, and would rather peruse through pictures of us doing weird and wonderful things, but for the small majority of you that would like a little back-story: you're in luck.

basically the pictures following this come in two big sets: those pertaining to sydney and those pertaining the cairns. remember, always read from the bottom to the top, if you can (the captions make far more sense that way). anyhoo, the whole crew headed down with jamila in tow to go to sydney a week and some change ago.

condensing sydney into a paragraph... it was a bit chilly when we got there! the group realized we were glad we're attending school in brisbane as opposed to melbourne or sydney -- they're still rainy and dreary from time to time while we're getting the 30 degree plus weather up here! we got rides into town, and shehz and i mananged to get comfortable in our hostel: footprints. when i say comfortable, i mean comfortable minus the fact that the guy already staying in the place was about as smelly as people can get without having to wear a haz-mat suit around them. we weren't a big fan of him.

most of our days consisted of wandering the streets of sydney and looking at random stuff. we went to the chinese gardens -- gardens set up by (crazy enough) china in the heart of the harbour district as a gift. very scenic and calming. we also took a jetboat ride around sydney harbour and into the surrounding regions. i came pretty close to yakking, but that doesn't mean that the views weren't fantastic! we ate at a few small cafes, featuring overpriced everythings, served with a slice of overpriced something-else. we did our best to seek out absolute holes to eat in, where we could get breakfast for less than $8. a challenge, to say the least!

the highlight for me was the tour of sydney opera house and our subsequent attendance at a big performance of shostakovich, with charles dutoit conducting! we got to sit in the third row of the concert hall -- the showpiece theatre of the sydney opera house, for $25 each! a steal, as far as i'm concerned. we also took quick walks to hyde park, where we tried playing human chess for a bit. a quick jaunt around the royal botanical gardens also. and who could forget our sojourn to bondi beach? an essential visit for any australian tourist. the waves were massive when we went, so i spent most of my time on the beach making comments like, "... wow." and "... jeez!", as well as the perennial, "... did you SEE that?!". all in all, quite a good time.

rounding things off was a trip to the sydney aquarium, and visits to the museum of contemporary art and the justice and police museum. my favourite part of the MCA? definitely the room with videos projected on each wall. and what were the videos of? some random man shaking a midget's hand vigorously on repeat. or wandering around on a beach during sunset and riding a cardboard horse. other highlights? watching a video of a lanky, pale man staring at you from a video monitor. oh sure, he'd sit there motionless for a good minute or two. and after that? BAM! he slaps himself RIGHT in the face, making a huge clapping sound and generally just freaking you out. then it's another 2-3 minutes, and another slap. repeat ad nauseum for 45 minutes. the slap represents the "slap in the face" dealt by "social constructs" when we wake up each morning. good work, buddy!

... that's about it for sydney! on to cairns...

shehz and i headed up there ourselves while al and jamila went to the whitsundays. we were lucky enough to have the company of a certain french/swedish contingent for the first few days. it was right down to business though, and shehz and i started our diving course the day after we arrived. bright and early, it was always nice to have the 7:30 drive over to "down under dive" for a few classes in how to breathe underwater. our teacher, mike the dutchie, could be a bit aggressive during classes, but shehz and i managed to graduate the classwork on the dean's list: too bad i can't do that at waterloo! we made some great friends, and after the first two days of pool and class work, it was off to the great barrier reef for some serious diving!

diving on the great barrier reef is certainly something to behold! i was amazed at how different it is diving around in a swimming pool with your gear on, and then descending down to 14m below the surface and dodging coral and giant fish nammed willie. willie, however, is a wonderful fish. he's one massive napoleon maori wrasse (as seen in the aquarium pictures), who's always hanging out at hastings reef because they feed him. this is a plus for the divers, as you can just swim around and touch this giant fish who's about 3/4 your size. what a thrill!

after our diving (of which we have very few pictures, unfortunately: bug shehz if you wanna see a few that i took of him all dolled up in his gear), we had a few day trips and then it was time to go home. we managed to see the atherton tablelands on a big tour (which included a massive 6'8", 230lb tourguide -- yikes! we also rented a car and took a day trip up to cape tribulation, which is the northermost point accessible by car on the east coast of australia. it doesn't sound that impressive, but it is, i promise. great place, and almost nobody there on the beach! we also paid a visit to the croc farm, full of crazy, crazy men who feed crazy, crazy crocodiles full chickens. my favourite part was when one of the crocs took a snap at the garden implement (a plastic rake with a wooden handle) used by the staff to keep the crocs... well to be honest i don't know WHAT they're for, but the croc just snapped the whole thing in half in a flash. couldn't even really tell it had moved, and suddenly the whole rake was gone. oh well! they have a nice selection over there. also, if you can get ahold of a recording of one of these cassowaries making its scary, intimidating "get away from here" sound -- hook me up! it honestly sounded like a big dinosaur. it would look down at its belly and just start vibrating, and this massive rumbling sound emanates from its... whole body i guess!

the cairns nightlife also deserves a comment, due to its often less-savoury nature. places like "the woolshed" and "rhinobar" draw large crowds of international backpackers through their doors, and manage to entertain them nightly with both free meals (yeah, i said it -- free!) and mad dancing. speaking of mad, our hostel (the asylum) hosted a little event called "mad monday" (coincidentally the name of this post). what a great time! it was a big trip around various local joints to dance and be merry. and be merry i was! for $10 i got myself a t-shirt, dinner, free entrance to three clubs, and a whole bunch of free drinks to keep me busy. wee!

in conclusion (don't you love essays that end like this?), i'd like to talk about my helicopter flying experience. my family (thanks guys!) purchased me a trial flight up in a bell r22 heli-chopper. i took a little 3-hour journey (thanks to shehz for the company) trip down to coolangatta airport where i met up with brett, my instructor. after a quick 15 minute briefing on how a helicopter actually works, it was time to head onto the tarmac and up into the skies! what a crazy experience. just a few minutes after warming up the engine (i'll put up some pictures soon) we were scooting along just feet off the ground. it was like driving a hovercraft. and then, 20 seconds later, we're up 500 feet in the air! the windows on this helicopter are massive too, so you can basically see the ground looming below you. after getting up to altitude, brett goes over the controls once again, and then speaks the fateful words "you have control." i repeat, "i have control.", and then off i go along the coolangatta coast! i practiced maintaining a steady flight path, speeding up and slowing down the aircraft, and all sorts of other crazy business. whilst up in the air, the radio tower told us that there was a swimmer missing, so brett and i took some time out to scoot around the area scouring the waters for any missing swimmers. we didn't really see anything, but nevertheless i felt important. also got a nice view of a breaching whale from altitude -- what a great time!

i got back in one piece, without a scratch on me. now, all i have to do is come up with the $50,000 to get my commercial helicopter pilot's licence, and another $250,000 for the bell r22. and then about $600/hr whenever i want to fly it. it's coming, it's coming.

nothing too big planned for the next little while, so don't be surprised if it's quiet. hopefully this will keep you entertained. bye bye for now!

> eee

A church in Cairns: quite reminiscent of an MC Escher drawing if I don't say so myself!

A nice series of waterfalls that we got to slide down on our bums. Not this part, but one a little further down. I think these parts might hurt a bit...

I may not look it, but this is number three.

A cassowary. These things make crazy dinosaur noises when they get pissed off. I got to hear it. Boxer soil count? Two.

I think most people would tell this guy that what he's doing isn't the BEST idea in the world...

A sleeping baby kangaroo. Awwwww!

Yep, I'm getting more comfortable with the crocodiles. Just lean over the fennnnceeeee... theeeeeere we go.

Feeding more crocs at the farm. I'm surprisingly close to this one. The owner's think they can just open the door to the crocodile pens and KEEP them open while they do these demos. It makes for great pictures... and soiled boxer shorts.

Pregnant kangaroo. Well, I suppose post-pregnant is more accurate. Check out the poor thing inside. Some kinda crazy orientation: can't be comfortable!

Mic has a seat on a crocodile at his crocodile farm. His name is Gregory. Gregory weighs a ton. Seriously. He's over 5m long.

A nice big fern. Looks like a tree! It's not: it's a fern.

...

Milla Milla falls -- one of the most photographed spots in Australia. Who am I to not take a photo?

Al, atop one of the highest peaks in the Atherton Tablelands.

A massive strangler fig tree. If you want more information about how cool the strangler fig is, just ask me. If you don't, just trust me on the fact that it's cool -- it killer other trees mercenary style in order to live! This one strangler fig has already killed four and is on its fifth.

Not your everyday road sign. You've got (clockwise from top left) bandicoot, wallabee, cassowary, and bush turkey. You'd best watch out for ALL of them!

Two towering Kaori pines (I think that's what they're called) -- hundeds of years old! They were each about 50m tall.

Shehz -- same story.

Jam-Jam-Thank-You-Ma'am in the backa the rental.

A full-on shot of the beach.

Al and Space Jam hang out on Cape Tribulation -- What a beach!

A pretty rock. It says 'E', like my nickname. It also had some other letters, but I tried to keep them out of the picture so it spelled my nickname. It was meant to be!

A nice boat in the harbour in Port Douglas.

Good GOD, this doesn't seem like a good idea.

There's just so much wildlife to be seen in Australia. Check out this rare species!

A little teasing from Jamila always keeps Al in line.

I decided to indulge in some early morning Bundaberg "Horehound" Beer. It's non-alcoholic, but you can tell I'm quite impressed with the taste...

Shehz gets straight to work at the Asylum Backpacker. Not quite sure what he's working ON, but it sure looks hard!